Divorce Self-Care Tips

No one feels prepared for divorce. It’s a complicated process … emotionally, legally, and financially. Ending a marriage or long-term relationship is a lot for a person to take on, particularly when children are involved. Given the amount of stress that can be generated, self-care becomes critical during and after the divorce journey. As every divorce is unique, individuals must find their own blend of self-caring actions to take as they wind through the divorce process and move into a new normal lifestyle. Below we’ve assembled words of wisdom around self-care during divorce.

 

MICHELLE STOWELL, CFLS

image close-up of MLSWhen going through the divorce process, it’s very easy to get overwhelmed with everyday life. But you still have to go to work, take care of the kids, pay bills, and generally keep up with a daily routine. Clients I find who successfully navigate divorce are the ones who stay vigilant with healthy eating, stress-relieving exercise, and maintaining friendships. They also stay focused on finding the balance between moving on and giving themselves time to heal.

 

NEIL FORESTER, CFLS

image of close-up headshot for NMEFMy clients often remark that not knowing what the future holds for their post-divorce life is one of the most stressful parts of the process. I say fight that stress by learning everything you can during the process. Make sure you grasp the financial implications and parenting decisions being made. Ask loads of questions and stay focused on your long-term goals. The more you know, the more comfortable you’ll be moving forward. When fear starts to win, tell yourself “I have everything I need.” Repeat. Because it’s true — you may not have everything you want right now; but if you take pause, you probably do have everything you need.

 

MATT PURCELL, CFLS

image of close-up headshot for MKPDivorce is stressful enough without making one of your primary activities thinking about your divorce. I usually recommend that clients find something, anything, that they enjoy doing — that isn’t self-destructive — and carve out time to do more of it. Tennis. Golf. Writing. Drawing. Whatever. These types of creative or physical outlets can be tremendous stress-relievers. It’s okay to balance a healthy distraction with making meaningful headway on your divorce journey.

 

MELISSA HARMAN

image of close-up headshot of MJHFamily law cases are the most emotional type of cases because someone (and sometimes many “someones”) is telling you what to do with your family and your life. Parties often feel out of control — not just because a divorce, custody or support action is a huge life event, but also because of the involvement and rules put in place by the courts and attorneys. It is important to take a step back, out of the emotional turmoil, and refocus on what is most important to you — and if you don’t know what that is, this may be a great opportunity to try your hand at new things, such as volunteer work. Finding outlets that are productive, distracting and give you personal satisfaction are the best way to balance these emotions and make sure you’re taking care of you.

 

KEELEY NICKELSON

image close-up headshot KLNGGoing through a divorce, or any sort of custody/familial litigation, it’s easy to get caught up in the stress. It’s important to know what you need – from your attorney, and from yourself. Find an attorney who can advocate for you, answer your legal questions, but also navigate you through this difficult time. And if you aren’t getting what you need, speak up. Equally as important, find the strength to allow yourself time to forget about the ongoing litigation and take time to relax. Get to the gym, see your therapist, walk your dog. Whatever keeps you grounded, make it a priority.

 

 

KRISTEN SELLERS

image of close-up headshot for KLSDivorce can be one of the most stressful and emotionally draining events in a person’s life, especially when child custody is at issue. It is critically important to create a strong support system to help you navigate these often unchartered waters. Spend quality time with family and close friends, reconnect with loved ones you may have lost contact with over the years, or join a support group to meet new people that understand what you are going through. Take time for yourself whenever you can by staying active, reading a good book, or enjoying the occasional glass of wine.

 


ABOUT THE FIRM: FORESTER PURCELL STOWELL PC is a Northern California law firm focused exclusively on specialized counsel for complex divorce and family law issues. Its shareholders are Certified Family Law Specialists, recognized by the State Bar of California’s Board of Legal Specialization. The firm regularly represents business owners, professionals, and other high net worth individuals (or their spouses) in divorce, custody disputes, premarital agreements, and related actions. Attorneys can be reached at info@foresterpurcell.com or 916 293 4000. This information is general in nature and should not be construed as legal advice.
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